We never spent the day at the ocean or the bay. In fact my mother was very afraid for us kids at the ocean. So my yearning to be with her (the sea) was discouraged. I have alway had a very intimate connection with the water element. My father had a business that was right on the San Francisco Bay. He was in the fish business. I always wanted to jump off the pier and be one with her. But that was unheard of. I was told "Nobody swims in the Bay! Its polluted!" Later I found out that lots of people swam in the Bay including my uncle who swam the Golden Gate Bridge. But I'm getting off track.
Our days at the river would start out with me riding in the back seat of my mothers car imagining that this beautiful powerful woman was inside of me and I was going home to the water. I was going home to the greens of it all. I was ancient and I was becoming whole again.
As an adult I brought my own children to the River. I have had this homecoming every year for the last 53 years. And even as an adult I still feel the feeling of coming home once my feet are in the water. As I sit and write this I realize that I was having a shamanic experience. Even at the age of eight the ancestors were calling to me through the water. The spirits have always been with me. I have always had a relationship with them. But didn't realize all the serendipity I experienced over the years was really communication.
When I was 18 my brother gave me a gift. He gave me an all expense paid trip to Hawaii. I knew after that trip I was supposed to be with the Ocean. I spent 2 weeks in the water. Having the same altered state experience I had a a young child. The same coming home feeling. The same healing. On the plane ride back I cried the entire 5 hours back. I was grieving a great loss. I had ingrained in my head that Northern California water wasn't a safe place for me. I had been standing on the shore all my life and now I knew how it felt to merge with the birth waters, the amniotic fluid of grandmother earth. It would take another 30 years to finally work through the brainwashing I had been given as a child and take my relationship to the water to a new level.
My connection with water runs deep. I met a distant cousin a few years back. He was into genealogy. He had my family tree dating back to 1640. I, apparently, come from a long line of fishermen. Every male in my family tree was a fisherman dating back as far as the records go. Water goes beyond me. To go out on the sea and ask the sea to feed your family. To make it your livelihood for generations and generations. This takes deep unwavering faith, fearlessness, and most of all, the ability to call on help. Most of my life has been spent connected to or dancing with the water element. I know now that this has been my ancestors way of communicating with me. Our connection to our ancestors is part of the big picture. They are there for us. We just have to listen with our hearts and with our bodies. We are all connected, physically, spiritually, vibrationally. When ancestors speak, listen.
I have been working with my ancestors to bring health and abundance to my life and I am now offering the chance to learn how to do it for yourself. I am offering a workshop called